Death Row Saved My Life and Other Stories:

Finding Meaning in a Harsh World

As told to Cliff Williams


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Annotated Contents


Part 1


Jesse: Invited to Tragedy 


Jesse describes his reactions to the tragic stories he heard when interpreting for Spanish-speaking people in medical contexts.


Jenni: Escaping My Heroin Addiction


Jenni became a heroin addict in her midthirties when she was in a detox program for OxyContin. She sold heroin and lived on the streets. At its worst, she was locked in an empty truck for nine months by her boyfriend. 


Kendall: The Audacity of Speaking Out: A Woman’s Story 


Kendall started life spunky and outspoken  That was squashed by her sixth grade teacher, and she became submissive and quiet. She went to college with the aim of jolting herself out of that.


“Evelyn”: Burned in a Flash Fire


Evelyn was severely burned in a flash fire on a sailboat, almost dying. She describes the details of how that happened and her way of dealing with it in subsequent years.


Bobby: Am I Really Gay?


Bobby grew up gay in a context in which being gay was severely criticized. He describes his struggle to accept himself as gay, which he finally did in a transformative experience in his midthirties. He found that when he “stopped having problems with being gay, no one else had a problem with it either.”


Falling in Love

Ruby and David: 


Ruby and David were able to fall in love and marry despite living on opposite sides of the world.

Denise and Jon: 


Denise and Jon were able to sustain love in their late marriage
despite a two-and-a-half-decade age difference.


“Ariana”: Confronting My ADHD 


Ariana finally figured out that she was afflicted with ADHD after experiencing its symptoms since early elementary school. Her life was subsequently transformed.

Kétu: Death Row Saved Me


When Kétu was sentenced to die, he decided that he wanted to know who he was as a Black American and why he was in the position he was in. In prison he read hundreds of books, which transformed him.

Lora: Homeless as a Child


Lora drifted around with her mother for six months when she was a child. From the vantage point of her midfifties, she explains how that affected the rest of her life.


Part 2


“Sara”: Betrayed by My Husband 


On the evening before Sara and her husband were to leave on a trip to celebrate their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, she learned that he had been an alcoholic and a sex addict for the previous twenty years. She tried to salvage the marriage, but did not succeed.


Amy: From a Refugee Camp to the United States 


Amy was born in and grew up in a Thai refugee camp. She came to the U.S. not knowing a single word of English. 


“Robyn”: Fighting Anorexia 


Robyn’s eating disorder began when she was a young child and lasted until her midtwenties, when she was slowly dying because of it. After spending a year in a treatment center, she finally was able to be free of it.


Andrew: The Making of an American Rock Musician


As a child, Andrew loved rock music despite his parents’ condemnation of it as being “from the devil.” He persisted, learning to play the guitar, write songs, and sing solo and with a band.


Saved from Suicide

“Annette”: The Letter 


Annette’s intense suicidal impulses dissolved when she started
corresponding with someone whom she had never met.


“Naomi”: Coloring in a Professor’s Office 


Naomi’s suicidal depression lifted after an hour’s silent visit with one of her college professors.


“Caleb”: A Long Hug 


A chance encounter relieved Caleb of the gun he was going to use to kill himself.


“Caroline”: Moral Beauty


Caroline had planned on killing herself but decided to stay alive after reflecting on the idea of moral beauty.


Jonas: Growing Up Amish 


Jonas came to detest both the culture and the faith of the Amish people he grew up in. One Sunday morning while his parents were at church, he left a note for them and walked from his settlement to a friend’s house three miles away.


Michelle: Transitioning to a Woman  


Michelle wrestled with her gender identity from a young age, married, had children, all as male presenting. She finally accepted herself as a woman when her wife exclaimed, “You need to stop lying to yourself. You’re transgender, and you aren’t happy as a man. You need to admit that you’re happy as a woman.” She then medically transitioned to a woman.


Part 3


Ellen: Found Dead 


Ellen found her husband blue and stiff, lying on the floor beside their bed, after being away for a week. She screamed and ran up and down the halls in their apartment building, pounding on doors and shouting, “Help me, help me! My husband’s dead!” 


“Bella”: Extricating Myself from Domestic Violence 


Bella returned to her partner again and again even though he had caused her a great deal of emotional and physical pain, which had gotten worse with each return. Years after a clean break from her partner, she reflects on what drove her to return so often.


“Claudia”: A Month and a Half in a Cult 


Claudia thought she would be working in an exemplary mission organization in a small town in Mexico. However, she soon began to have a number of disturbing experiences, which got so bad that she had to pack up and leave.


“Matthew”: Disillusioned with Teaching 


Matthew’s excitement to start teaching was severely blunted when the 2020–2022 pandemic required that teaching be done online, which caused students to lose motivation.


“Stephanie”: A Schizophrenic Mother and an Abusive Father 


Stephanie’s childhood and high school years were filled with such severe trauma that she left home the day after she graduated from high school and never again had contact with her father. 


Shirley: Death of My Infant Son


When Shirley’s son died two weeks after he was born, she could not talk about it for ten years.


Katie: Finding My Birth Family


Katie grew up knowing that she was adopted. She met her birth family when she was nearly forty.

Michael: Recovering from a Stroke


Michael suddenly found himself lying on the driveway, unable to move but thinking everything was okay. That experience and the ensuing hospitalization changed him in major ways.


Rebecca: Surviving the Suicide Disease


Trigeminal neuralgia is called the suicide disease because it causes such severe and unrelenting facial pain that its victims want to die. Rebecca experienced that pain and wanted to die, but she survived.




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Names in quotation marks are pseudonyms.


About Cliff Williams

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